Be Well

I’ve found myself becoming anxious about many things. This anxiety at times transpires to agitation, mood swings, etc. Majority of times I am pretty happy go lucky but I have my moments when I just feel overwhelmed.  To be completely transparent, at times I feel sad even.  Yes me, the newlywed, the mother of 1 amazing girl, me, the superwoman. I am a strong woman but at moments I feel weak. Weak to the pressures of work, family, etc. Life can be vastly overwhelming. My thoughts and emotions sometimes take me to another place and I’m pretty sure if I don’t get a handle it can take me to a very dark place.

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Why must we always put on a strong face and consider it taboo to have a moment of weakness or uneasiness? The stigma of being viewed as unstable or looney, the pressure of living up to these perfect lives on social media, or simply the fear of feeling like a failure results in many people fighting mental battles alone. Sometimes one may think, “Oh it’s nothing, everyone goes through stuff” or “I don’t want to complain to anyone about  issues.”  What we all must realize is just balancing life is heavy. Even if you do it in a way that seems seamless and perfect to others the wrath of this roller coaster of life can be pretty draining.

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It’s also ok to feel overwhelmed and burned out but we do not have to stay in that state. Lets put this mental health stigma to rest and take care of ourselves. No sense of looking good on the outside if you’re not feeling your very best on the inside!

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Today I vow to put me and my mental first. Seeking help does not make me weak. Drowning in sorrows does.  I never would have imagined I would desire to seek professional help but my mission in life to help others I must lead by example and promote healthiness on all levels. My job offers EAP (Employee Assistance Program) where you can get up to five counseling sessions free a year. I just started the process and hope to see someone soon. It’s a must I keep my mind strong and I encourage others to do the same!!!

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Be well & stay true!!!

 

Lets Catch Up

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Wow can you believe this year is almost over? 2018 has been a pretty great year for me. I graduated and earned my bachelor’s in May.

Graduation Day

In August, my love and I of six years had a wonderful budget wedding that I planned in 4 months, which I can’t wait to tell you more about (future blog post). This past September I got an unexpected promotion at work offering an increase in pay, new challenges and other rewards. So many wonderful things right?

 

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Mrs. Coppages

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The Coppages

As rewarding as 2018 has been this year has also been pretty emotional for me. I’ve learned plans don’t always go how you “plan”. I discovered the lack of authenticity in people, I begin to stop pouring so much of myself into people/relationships. Don’t get me wrong, I still nurture my mutually fulfilling relationships but the ones I am unsure about I started to not always reach out and see who still would. I’ve learned that it’s ok to grow apart from people even though you don’t want to grow apart and on the other hand I’ve learned the ones who don’t want to grow apart from you won’t. I’ve learned to love who loves me. I’ve learned to appreciate who’s there for me and not worry or harbor ill feelings towards those who aren’t. I’ve learned that unhappy people will never be happy for you.

I’ve second guessed myself, I’ve falsely assumed things. I’ve been wronged. I’ve been wrong. I’ve learned to appreciate the bright side of things. I’ve learned to speak my mind and be more expressive to things and people that’s in my corner instead of keeping things bottled in. I’ve learned to pull away from drama and chaos because once you’re pulled into it you’re a part of it.

I’ve learned that although social media is a wonderful tool it’s also one of the biggest tools of deception. I’ve learned the importance of unplugging from the virtual world often because the negative vibes can easily be internalized. I’ve learned to be more appreciative for what’s in front of me. I’ve learned to trust the process. I’ve learned to appreciate the highs and the lows. I’ve learned to remind myself that trouble don’t last long. I’ve learned that’s it’s ok to not always agree as long as what you take away from it is love and understanding. I’m choosing to embrace my realist but optimistic persona. I’m learning to really toughen up and get out of my feelings.

All and all I realized how blessed I am & I’m hoping to end the year out with a bang.  Loads of good vibes and making memories!

 

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How has 2018 been to you thus far? Any discoveries, observations, or insights?

Love,

Soulfully True

 

Finding Balance

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As a busy professional, wife, mother, and a host of other things you may be, life can get pretty hectic and you can easily become burnt out. As women, we tend to take care of everything and everyone and oftentimes, we neglect to take care of ourselves.

Below I have listed a few essentials that keeps me grounded and help me live a more balanced life:

  1. Distribute Tasks at Home– Home life can get hectic. As the woman of the house you are expected to make sure everything gets done and stays in order. Some probably can take on that role alone and somehow remain stress free. Me on the other hand, I solicit my other housemates for help. Everyone is responsible for given tasks around the house. This way everyone plays a role in keeping an orderly household and no one is stressed out and taking everything on. pexels-photo-273850.jpeg
  2. Invest in a Personal Notebook– If your thoughts are always all over the place like mine a notebook would benefit you. Whenever you think of something important or sometimes things that are not so important, take your notebook and jot it down. A busy lifestyle can sometimes take a toll on our memory so a handy, purse sized notebook will be your best friend.

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    My current favorite notebook. (I have so many 🙂 )

  3. Daily/Monthly Planner- With a busy and sometimes chaotic life, organization is the key to sanity. Keep your life in order with a handy-dandy calendar. Currently I am using the Happy Planner Faith- Grace Upon Grace Planner  

  4. Designate Positive Reading Time to Jump-start Your Day– This could be a bible verse, an inspiring quote, a self-help book, etc. This helps to create a positive outlook for your day. I get daily quotes from a mobile app called Enliven.Screenshot_20180111-153540
  5. Learn to Say No– Sometimes we take on more than necessary because of our natural nurturing and pleasing personalities. If you feel overwhelmed it is ok to say no! What good is the world if everyone is happy and carefree except for you? Do yourself and everyone around you a favor and just say NO to avoid unnecessary stress and burn out. no
  6. Do Something Special for You– Take some time away from the daily grind and do something pleasing for you. This can come in the form of a fun vacation, a massage, a night out with friends, sending your family out for a few hours so you can get a few hours of quiet time to maybe do something as simple as curl up and read a book. pexels-photo-428547.jpeg
  7. Have a Glass of Wine– Yes I said it. Sometimes a refreshing glass of wine is just what the doctor ordered to relax and unwind. If wine is not your thing please feel free to skip this tip. 🙂 pexels-photo-94437.jpeg

These are just a few of my must haves/must dos to assist me in living a more balanced life.

Please feel free to add to the list and share what works for you in the comment area. Also don’t forget to follow and subscribe.

Until next time,

Soulfully/Truthfully Yours

 

Happy 2018

Hello Hello!!

2017 was not too terrible. The good, job transitions, business launches, engagement (Yes engagement, I’m a  fiancee). The not so good, the loss of a friend dear to me to a tragic accident. Outside of the tragedy, it was basically a steady year that flew by extremely fast. I am truly grateful for the newfound insight and wisdom 2017 left me with. However, I am glad for another year and a new beginning.

To cap the year off I got a chance to do one of my favorite things with one of my favorite gal pals. Paint and Sip!!! Yes, who knew that painting your own unique masterpiece could be so therapeutic. If you’ve never taken a paint class you must treat yourself. I have been to several venues who host paint and sip (you get to paint and enjoy a beverage, customarily wine, BYOB). For this outing I visited Pinot’s Palette. I loved the atmosphere and the hosts were awesome as well.

Check out some of the pics from our wonderful paint night experience:

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Me with my finished creation

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My bff & I enjoying our chilly night out

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Our hostess painting that guided us through the night!

 

Looking forward to filling you in on some things and having you along for the journey of this new year. Please subscribe so you won’t miss a beat.

~Soulfully/Truthfully Yours~

 

 

Class is Back in Session

 

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So yesterday was the first day of classes. This semester I have 2 online and 1 that I am going in for. I have my planner in order and getting myself organized for the semester. As I am preparing for the semester I see that me being in class 2 nights a week (Tues & Thurs) and other obligations on Wednesdays I will be away from home more often than not during the week.

Yesterday we grabbed fast food on my way in from class. I was actually disgusted with it. I made a mental note to myself that my family and I will not eat fast food several nights a week this semester so of course I had to come up with a plan.

Meal prepping is a practice that I’ve been hearing about forever but never took the time to try out myself. Starting this Sunday I plan to prepare at least 3-4 meats for the week. My classes are not too too long so I can easily prepare sides when I get home. With the meats prepared I won’t have  to worry about everyone being up way past their bedtimes waiting for dinner to get done. I can see everyone sitting down to eat dinner by 8:00 p.m. then going to bed no later than 9:00 p.m. This meal prepping thing will save money and time.

Juggling a full-time job, a family, and school is not the easiest but there are no excuses. You have to try out different things that will help make your journey easier for you. I will keep you all posted about my meal prepping. If you have any tips or suggestions for me please leave them in the comments.

*Soulfully True*

HELLO 2017

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Happy 2017 everyone!!

I welcome it with open arms.

The last leg of 2016  (July & after) was totally unpredictable. If you read “The Master-Plan is not always Master” you know I was let go from my job of 7 years. That was a total shock. I lost my paternal grandmother the day after my last day of employment. That brought on another whirlwind of emotions. Both of these things were totally unexpected. You can never prepare yourself for such things. After the initial  shock and emotions from my losses I got through the rest of the year with a high held head and joy in my heart. I refused to let myself stay down in a funk.

Ok now. Enough of that already… HELLO 2017!!!

I’m so grateful for a clean slate and the opportunity at all life has to offer.

Stay tuned…..

The Master-Plan is not always Master

gods plan

In life we all make plans. These big, grand plans of the way we want things to go in our life. It’s pretty ironic that nothing ever goes as planned.

I’ve been on my current job for 7 years in a position that although I am blessed to have doesn’t make me feel very great. But I had a plan. My plan was to continue working my mediocre job and finish my education since my company pays for it 100%. No matter how unhappy I was with with my job I was going to stick to my plan. Guess what I almost made it until an unexpected loop got thrown into my “grand plan”. Last Thursday I was called into an impromptu meeting that I did not see coming at all. This meeting included my immediate supervisor, the head of the department, another staff member and a man in a suit that I was soon to learn was a HR personnel. I was all smiles as usual thinking this was a usual workday meeting. To my surprise the other staff member and myself were handed a 90 day notice of our job ending. Not in a million years did I expect this to happen. After all I had “planned” to graduate college on my job’s dime and gladly hand them my 2 weeks’s notice and go find this wonderful job in my desired field. Boy did they bring me back to earth. It took all I had to hold my tears in and not cry in front of the people who are putting a stunt in my livelihood.

My initial thoughts were OMG what am I going to do? My second thoughts were well hey maybe this is meant. I have 90 days to figure out a plan. There I go with this “plan” mess lol. I was giving the permission to go home early and come to terms with things. I was in shock and disbelief but aside from that I saw a gleam of sunshine. I have been struggling taking care of a family, working a full time job, and juggling classes. The latter of course had my least focus. I’ve been in school the last so many years but it has kind of taken the backseat of everything else. Especially work. It got hard. My grades were starting to slip. I stressed trying to figure out how I could do an internship in my field to kind of get a feel of things. Once I got home from work, cleaned, and fed my family. I was often too tired to pick up a school book. I never felt I had time to focus and give 100% on the thing that was most important to me. Could this curve ball layoff that wasn’t a part of my “plan” be exactly what I needed? Is this my opportunity to combine my savings, the severance pay they will give me, and use my unemployment benefits to focus on my last year of school? In addition to the cash amount of my severance package, the company is also willing to pay for 2 more years of school. Wow I’m winning right?!

I haven’t shared my news with many but the one’s I have are so supportive. I was actually expecting a lot of negative feedback but the one’s closest to me never lost sight of my potential. They believe in me and know I will be A ok whatever direction I decide to take. For that I am so grateful. My significant other seems worried although he won’t admit but I assured him everything will be A ok. Everything happens for a reason. Although what lies ahead of me is very scary since I don’t have any solid “plans” I am very optimistic. Plans are meant to change so why not just have an idea of things and just go with the flow. I have a pilot that is in charge of the journey of my life. He just had to remind me. God is great! I can’t say everything will be perfect and peachy. I can’t say I won’t get sad and cry sometimes. I can’t say I have it all figured it out. What I can say is everything will be ok. I really believe that!

Janet Jackson Concert Rocked

So the other day I was minding my own business when my mom called to let me know a friend of hers had a pair of tickets that she wanted to give away for the Janet Jackson concert and asked if I would like to have them. My thoughts were, “is this a trick question”? lol. Of course I would be crazy to turn down the opportunity to see a legend such as Janet Jackson. It didn’t even matter that the tickets weren’t the best seats and I didn’t have time to get an exclusive outfit together for the concert. The spontaneity of the entire ordeal made it even better. I called up my my best girl pal and we were set! Plus did I mention it was FREE!!!!!!!

Enough of the rambling now on to the good stuff. Tuesday, September 29, 2015 Miss Jackson came to the FedEx Forum in Memphis, TN and did not disappoint at all. Her voice was amazing, her dance moves were rocking, she looked stunning, and she put on an overall excellent show!! This small, unexpected blessing was an opportunity of a lifetime for me!! I’m an 80s baby so I’m all about the 80s and 90s R&B/Pop. If you have the opportunity to check out Janet Jackson on her Unbreakable Tour, you will be in for a treat. Check out some of the pictures from my night:

Janet!!! #theunbreakabletour

Janet!!! #theunbreakabletour

Janet!!! #theunbreakabletour

Janet!!! #theunbreakabletour

Janet!!! #theunbreakabletour

Janet!!! #theunbreakabletour

Me after the concert!!

Me after the concert!!

My bestie & I

My bestie & I

Great Experience!!

Great Experience!!

Another Awesome Birthday!!

My birthday was Monday, August 24th and I must admit, I always have awesome birthdays. I save my money throughout the year so I can do fun things to celebrate me once a year. This year wasn’t any different. Although I didn’t start making plans weeks and months in advance and reaching out to a lot of people like usual, my spare of the moment plans turned out well. I enjoyed everything.

I had the opportunity to go to Los Angeles, California last week and it was everything I could imagine. Although it was kind of business related I considered it the kick off to my birthday celebration and made the most of my personal time as well. I did a little shopping, a bunch of eating, and some sightseeing. The sucky part about it was I was only there for a couple of days and I didn’t get to explore everything I wanted but I absolutely enjoyed the beautiful weather, palm trees, and the beach. I most definitely see myself making a trip back in the very near future.

When I got off of my overnight flight back home Saturday morning I got a couple of hours of shut eye and was ready to go. My first stop was to go enjoy juicy, succulent crab legs at the casino. My beau knows that crab legs are one thing that make me very happy so he made sure to include them in the days agenda. After crab legs I went to hang out with my family members. Of course that night including side aching laughs.

Sunday afternoon was my annual birthday brunch. I know I forgot to mention this one fact but here goes. My mom and I share the same birthday. Yes her water decided to break on her birthday when she was headed out to celebrate herself. I was ready to come out to celebrate too!! 🙂 So basically my mom and I have a birthday brunch at this amazing restaurant in downtown Memphis, TN named The Majestic Grille every year. Just like every year it was an amazing turn out of family and friends. I waited until the last minute to tell my crowd but many were still able to show up and the ones who couldn’t sent their love and wishes! 🙂 Later that day my grandma fixed me an awesome Sunday dinner which included a made from scratch strawberry cake!! 🙂

The finale, my actual birthday fell on a Monday so I took the day off. It began as a lazy day of laying in bed. I received breakfast in bed so that was a plus!! I got up and did a little shopping until it was time to go get my daughter from school. We then prepared to go to my mom’s and I annual birthday dinner at Benihana (Honestly can’t beat the $30 birthday voucher they give you when you sign up for their birthday club). It was more of an intimate crowd (a party of 5) this year but as always it was awesome!! I enjoyed the food and the show the hibachi chef put on. Most of all I loved my company.

This birthday was very laid back and it kind of reflects my growth. I am usually in party mode but really wasn’t up for that much this year. Not saying I’ve completely retired the party scene just wasn’t feeling it. I appreciate the birthday wishes and love my family and friends showed me! Check out my pics from my birthday festivities!!:)

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Fun in LA

FUn in LA

FUn in LA

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Fun in LA

Fun in LA

Fun in LA

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Crablegs!! My fave!

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My mom’s & I birthday brunch!

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My mom’s & I birthday brunch!

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My mom & I at our birthday brunch!

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My mom & I at our birthday brunch!

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My beautiful daughter & I at the birthday brunch!

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My mom’s & I birthday brunch!

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Me with my girlfriends at the birthday brunch!!

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Strawberry cake my grandma made for me!

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My beautiful grandma and I

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Me on my birthday! Dinner at Benihanas

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My mom and my daughter. Dinner at Benihana

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My little family!

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🙂

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Dinner at Benihana

How to Stay Out of the Friend Zone

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A friend of mine recently rehashed a discussion he had with someone else about the “Friend Zone”. Hmmm what is the “Friend Zone” you ask? The Friend Zone is when a person you are romantically interested in place you in the box of “just a friend”. I know you’re thinking well isn’t it good to be a friend first before anything? Yes I do agree with that but it is different levels to it. You must be clear with your intentions from the jump, do not be their counselor, do not get too friendish  with them, and lastly be real and speak your mind/heart.

Firstly, you have to be real with yourself. What do you really want out of this person that you are pursuing or want to pursue? When you know what you want from them you should make that very clear in advance. Do not put yourself in a situation where you unconsciously become the go-to person for the open ear and shoulder to cry on. It’s nice to have sympathy for a person but don’t let it get too deep. I’m pretty sure this person has close friends they can already seek to vent about certain things mainly romance woes. You may want to diffuse that situation quickly before it gets out of hand.

Surely, you can get to know the person and talk about personal matters such as dreams, goals, likes/dislikes and other things of that nature. Let the conversation flow in a fun, a little flirty, and easy manner. Never let it be a one sided situation where they are sharing all of their woes and you are their adviser/counselor. Keep it light. You have to make sure they know you are not their counselor, you are a person who would love to eventually become the one for them.

    When you spend time with this person, let it be known to them that you consider this a special occasion. Not saying this has to be extravagant. Rewording your invitation to them might do the trick. Example, instead of saying lets get together to hang out, why not say, “Are you free this Friday, I would love to take you out?” or instead of saying come over for pizza and movies say, “I would like to have a special in-house movie and pizza date with you, are you available”? In my opinion that’s not coming off too pushy but you are making it clear that you’re not trying to hang out as buds, you have a special interest in mind.

    I can go on and on with pointers to stay out of the friend zone. Out of everything I can say most importantly, speak your mind. A closed mouth will never get fed. You are indeed the author of your own love story!!

Soulfully True